Thought #1 - Did you ever catch yourself making fun of a girl in high school, really rolling on them too, cracking everyone up, and then realize she over heard you? She runs off and spends the rest of the day crying in the girls' room, meanwhile you're left to deal with the scorn of every other girl in the school. Now you're facing the possibly of carrying the label of a jerk and spending the next four years of life dateless, so what do you do? You have to go into damage control mode and depending on how bad, ie awesome, your comments were will determine if an apology note is enough, or if you have to go full blown lie, telling her you have a crush on her, the jokes were your way of dealing with it, and asking her out on a date. It's a bitter pill but you figure an evening at Applebee's and having to sit through New Moon, is worth salvaging your rep.

Well Tennessee Titans owner Bud Adams just attempted to take Buffalo Bills fans out for a 10 dollar steak and baked potato today. Last week Bud got busted flipping off Bills fans as the Titans rolled on them. This week Bud took out a full page add in a Buffalo newspaper wishing the team luck for the rest of the season. Nice Bud. I'm sure Bills fans were completely won over this morning when they opened up the paper and saw your love letter. I really hope you remembered to dot the "i" in your note with a heart, that's crucial.

Thought #2 - You know how sometimes when you are playing football on a video game you accidentally hit the black button and your team automatically goes no huddle and runs the same play again or worse spikes the ball? I'm pretty sure that's what happened last night at the end of the LSU-Ole Miss game.

If you missed it, LSU, down 2, was driving with under a minute left. They completely wasted almost 20 seconds by waiting to call a time out, but then completed a pass to land themselves inside the 5 yard line with 1 second left on the clock. The clock stops to move the chains. So what are Les Miles options here?  Hmm, he could a. run the kicking team out and kick a field goal, b. line up and try one last shot at the endzone, or c. use the last second of the game to spike the ball, giving them no chance on earth to win. Les took option c, and Jordan Jefferson successfully spent the last second of the contest throwing the ball into the ground. I'm not real sure how mathematically inclined Jefferson or Miles are and I know everyone has their own personal skill sets, but please tell me one of you two can count to 1. Please tell me your thumb accidentally hit the black button Les and Jordan please tell me your vision was blurry and you thought you saw 11 on the clock. Otherwise this is probably the worst 1 second of football I've ever seen.

Thought #3 - When you've only won 2 games all season, spotting the other team points is probably a bad idea. New York Knick Nate Robinson apparently doesn't get this. With .5 seconds left in the first quarter, Nate lobed up a shot towards the Nets basket and drained it! Unfortunately for the win less Nets it was ruled that he didn't get the shot off. I get it Nate, you're a nice guy and you feel bad for your struggling neighbor, but why don't you at least get to a half dozen wins before you start dishing out the charity buckets. The Knicks did pull out the victory despite Robinson's efforts and you know what, that lofty goal of double digit wins by Valentine's Day is seeming like a real possiblity.

Thought #4 - The state of Ohio has decided that Shaquille O'Neal will need to have some training before he can be an official deputy in Cleveland, carry a gun and make arrests. I'm sorry Ohio, did you not see Steel? Have you never played Shaq-Fu on SEGA? How do you not want this guy on the force? Surely you aren't doubting the qualifications of a NBA player's ability to use a firearm. You can do what you want, but you're wasting valuable time here that Shaq could be using to keep your city safe from Delonte West and the other villains from the Thunderdome.

By the way, I will completely turn a 180 on this if your department releases a sweet video of Shaq running the obstacle course in a sweatsuit that's two sizes too small. Oh and I really hope he gets to room with the guy who makes all the funny noises.

Thought #5 - You know that part of the movie "Friday Night Lights" where the old alumni still living in town come up to the guys, talking their glory days, and showing off their rings? Pretty sure Doug Flutie is college football's version of "Townie Alumni Guy." Every year dude comes out of the wood work and spins yarns about that one great play. Every year we sit through analysis of how great it was that dude randomly chucked up a prayer and it was answered. Listen, I get it Doug, this is all you have so you have to run with it. Flutie Flakes are off the market, and no body is calling on you for a drop kick anymore, but seriously, stop making me watch you run off the field in that belly cut jersey every year.