|
Tom Cable just needs a friend and the Wolverines AD gets rough with some students.
Thought #1- Remember that time in middle school when you got semi beat up in the boys room by that bully and you finally sucked it up and turned him in? Remember how instead of punishing him, kicking his black jeans, Dale Earnhardt t-shirt wearing butt out of school, they decided it was best to just send him to the Guidance Councilor for "help?" That's basically what the NFL has decided to do with Tom Cable. Cable "allegedly" broke an assistant coaches jaw earlier this season and "allegedly" has a history of beating women. So what does he obviously need? A buddy. Exactly, he just needs a ear, someone to listen and comfort him, meanwhile his former assistant and lady friends need a few stitches, prescription pain killer, and a couple frozen bags of peas. Yeah, that seems fair. The bully just smacked you around, ripped your favorite Alonzo Mourning Hornets tee, and stole your brand new trapper keeper. Now instead of getting suspended or punished in any way, he gets to skip science class and go sit on the couch in that dimly lit office that always smells like popcorn. You get to take notes on the reproduction system of a bird while he gets to talk about his feeling with that lady who reminds you of an overly joyful hobbit and eat candy corn. Yeah that's fair.
Thought #1b- By the way, I really don't want to see anymore pictures of Cable awkwardly hugging women. Why is it that bullies always look ridiculous in pictures with their significant others? They are always really awkwardly close and look like they are on the verge of a full on make out session at any moment. Gross.
Thought #2 - It must suck to be Matt Lienart. I mean the Ken Whisenhunt is really trying to give the guy a chance to play and Matt goes out, throws an INT, and forces Whisenhunt to pull him back out of the game. He's like the kid on your little team with all the gear, who looks great in the uniform, and whose dad is best friends with the coach. They try to play him, try to get him some reps, but at some point we might all just have to realize that kid may need a back up plan in life. Might want to start looking into accounting or law or something, because I don't know if you're going to be able to count on that MLB pay check to put bread on the table. Lienart looks great in a uniform, looks great on the cover of ESPN the magazine, even looks great on TV standing on the sidelines, but you know where he doesn't look great? Under center. Maybe he just needs some time to develop, maybe he just needs some more snaps, but he's not going to get to many more chances at that right now with Arizona, especially not after Sunday.
Thought #3- Can someone please get Michigan athletic director Bill Martin some passes to the guest area so he doesn't have to keep pushing college girls around to get in? On two occasions, when failing to produce the proper credentials to enter the guest area of the press box, Martin reportedly shoved the students running the gate out of the way in order to get in rather than just wait to have the matter cleared up. Being the AD I would imagine that would have taken all of what, 20, 30 seconds? I mean I know it must have been a shot to the old ego to have the college aged gate keepers not recognize you, but did you really need to get to that complimentary cocktail shrimp tray that bad? I know you couldn't have been in that big of a hurry to watch this year's Wolverines play. Were you afraid you'd get stuck with just getting the broken up Fritos or that someone would have already snagged all the Twix and Zagnuts from the candy tray and you'd be stuck eating those little butterscotch candies? I know those things suck and the dark chocolate M&Ms go fast but I don't think it's worth bullying up an undergrad for.
|
|
|